Emergency Yodeling Button
If Staples’ “That was easy!” button proves insufficiently annoying, try the Emergency Yodelling Button. American technology, central European neuroticism!
DOUGH-NU-MATIC
An endless supply of tiny and unpleasant donuts is yours with the $129.99 DOUGH-NU-MATIC. It is best simply never to clean it, than to imagine what cleaning it might entail.
Toilet-Sink Combo
Though inherently eligible, the inappropriate elegance of this contraption gives it an edge: “After flushing, fresh cold water is directed through the faucet for hand washing and drains into the tank to be used for the next flush.”
Einstein Brain Station
Stretch your mental acumen to the point where comparisons with the mind behind special and general relativity become reasonable, even necessary—by playing a $50 handheld Sudoku machine.
Digital Photo Ornament
That the Digital Photo Ornament can hold 60 photos in just 2MB of storage space says it all, folks. We are also informed that it “hangs from tree.”
Bilz Pinball
Bilz Pinball, a handheld “game” into which money is inserted to no sensible end, approaches an abstract purity in its crappiness: it is designed to be re-gifted.
Star Wars Mister
“Use the Force to beat the heat,” wheedles a pitch that takes contrivance to the point of complete illucidity. Each of these dreadful things is $20 at the Wireless Catalog.
Lighted Angel Wall Hanging
“Enjoy an inspirational and celestial twinkle,” begins the ad copy for this repulsive item, a blasphemy both to religion and design. “A beautiful scene of Guardian Angel watching over a country village, with sparkling fiber optic lights.”
Includes “brass-tone” rod and polyester tassles.
Arm Massager
The Arm Massager is a stationary device that one fists for therapeutic benefits. It is $50 at Taylor Gifts. [via RGS]
